We all have a story. It’s who we are and where we’re from. It’s our past and our present. It’s our triumphs and our failures. It’s our joy and our sadness.
Most of us feel our stories are written for us. We get up each day, do our thing, and our stories are written along the way. We look back on our lives and see the pages of our past as a reminder of either our successes or our mistakes (that depends on the lens through which you view your world).
We’re too focused on looking back and we just assume the blank pages will fill in as we go along.
But, if you pause for just a moment and think about those blank pages, tell me this...
What is the likely story that will fill those pages?
And….more importantly, how does that make you feel?
If you continue on the path you’re on right now with no intentional intervention from yourself, are you happy with your default future (i.e. the future you will have based on your current actions and the paths you are choosing right now)?
Would you like to change it?
You can…it’s entirely in your power, my dear.
I recently read the term “default future” in a coaching book (The Prosperous Coach) and loved the phrase. It basically means that if you do nothing to change what you are doing right now, it’s the future you will experience by default.
For most of us, our default futures aren’t really what we want.
We don’t want to stay in the same job, we don’t want to end up alone (or worse, a lifeless, loveless, shell of a relationship), we don’t want to still be living in our small town...or whatever is in your future that you don't desire.
We want more adventure, we want more excitement, we want more fulfillment and meaning in our lives.
If I asked most of you how you want to look back on your life when you’re old, you’d probably tell me you don’t want to have any regrets.
This should scare you.
Rewrite your Story
Our future is our choice. We know this, yet despite knowing that our future is entirely in our hands, we get stuck.
We fulfill responsibilities, we do what we’re supposed to do, and we let our fears of chasing our dreams keep us stuck in a life that isn’t what we truly want.
It happens to most of us.
Take a moment and think of someone that is truly living the life they want to live (as far as you know). They’ve taken the risks and followed their heart…can you see this person?
While they may have just been lucky to grab onto this life, I’m betting the reality is they intentionally grabbed the reins of their life and took active control of it. At some point, they realized what they wanted from their life and they made a conscious effort to put themselves on the path to get it.
You can do that too.
If you think about it from the perspective of those unfilled pages being filled for you without thought or effort on your part, how does that make you feel?
I hope it scares the crap out of you and that it maybe even makes you angry!
How about, instead, you reclaim the power of choice and mindfully and intentionally fill in those pages with the story you want to create.
What life do you want to live?
Its time to start that story and change the course of your life!
And...if you think you’re too old to try to change your story now, that’s crap. Time is going to pass anyway, so wouldn’t you rather spend it doing what lights you up instead of what drags you down?
Exercise: Start Writing
While I’ve got you fired up, let’s dive right in and start rewriting our stories!
Take out a piece of paper, or your journal, (or use the freebie PDF below!) and answer the following questions. Take your time with each of these and really consider your answer.
To really get the “truth” out, don’t just think about it in your head, consider how the question makes you feel and how your answer makes you feel.
Final tip: While you can write as much as you want…try to limit yourself to just one page per question or a 10 minute brain dump. You’re not looking to write a manuscript, this is just an exercise to get your mind thinking about things differently.
- Write down your past story: Your childhood, your early adulthood, etc.
- Write down your current story: Where you are right now in your current life
- Write down your default future story: If you don’t make any changes, what will life look like in 20 years, 30 years, etc.
- Write down your desired future story: Without worrying about the how, write down how you want your life to look in 20 years, 30 years, etc. (use colored pens for this one to literally add color to your future)
Now, read back over your answers and think about that desired future and jot down the answer to these questions:
- How does it differ between your default future story?
- What changes do you need to make to make this happen?
- How would you and/or your life be different if that’s the life you chose to live from this moment forward?
- What do you need to do to get you on that path?
We write our own story every single day, yet most of us don’t ever think about it.
It’s completely in your hands and it’s up to you to make it happen.
If you’d like to really take charge of your future…let’s partner up so I can help you get on that path!
As a certified coach, I can help you get really clear on the future you desire, work through what’s currently getting in your way, and help you get on the path you need to be on to make that future your reality.
Sound like something you’d be interested in pursuing? Then let’s work together to build a brighter future for your life!
***BONUS: REWRITE YOUR STORY WORKBOOK***
Before you go, don't forget to grab your FREE workbook to start rewriting your own life. You'll get 6 pages of prompts to dig in and get clear on what you want for your desired future so you don't end up living out your default future.