Stop Chasing the Wrong Things in Life {Chase These Instead!}

We’re all chasing something.

But, sadly, most people are spending their lives chasing the wrong things.

How do you know if you’re chasing the wrong things?  You’ll likely feel restless, frustrated, unfulfilled, and unhappy, just to name a few.

There’s a sense of wanting something more but not quite being able to put your finger on it.

Today, we’ll take a closer look at why we tend to go for the wrong things, what not to chase, and most importantly, what you should chase in life.

Why is this important?  Because if you spend your life running after the wrong things, you’ll waste years of life and only wake up when it’s too late.

 

WHERE WE GO OFF COURSE

Most people are outwardly focused - the things they have, the titles on their business card, the type of car they drive, living in the ‘right’ neighborhood.

None of those are inherently wrong, and all of those could genuinely provide you with a deep sense of fulfillment.

The subtle difference between chasing the right things versus the wrong things is the why behind it.

When you’re focused on the outside - what others think of you - you’re designing your life for the judgment of others.  Your motivation is what others think of you.

When you do this, you’ll always be behind the eight ball on true happiness and fulfillment.

 
When you are living your life at the whim of the judgment of others, you don’t know yourself enough to know what truly makes you happy and fulfilled.
Your ability to outpace the Jones’s is your source of happiness.
 

But, in reality, living your life according to what others think about you is just a balm to soothe your deep insecurities.

It’s understandable, as humans, we compare ourselves to others, and that’s human nature.  We also live in a very visual world where everyone {over}shares every minute detail of their life with the hope of getting likes and shares and comments.

Most people are so focused on the outside world, and they’re terrified of turning that gaze inward to see who they really are.

But, when you take the time to get to know what you truly want in life based on who you truly are, that’s when the magic happens.

To find real joy in life, you have to cultivate it on the inside. Too often people realize this when it’s too late.

Experiences create memories and these trump material things every time.

The things you should chase in life have nothing to do with status symbols and everything to do with fulfills you and makes you feel joy.

 

WHAT NOT TO CHASE IN LIFE

All too often we spend our life chasing the wrong things.  

It’s understandable - we spend far too much time obsessing over how we appear to others to soothe our insecurities.  We never learn to look within to find our north star and chase what truly matters to us.

Unfortunately, most people can’t even answer what it is in life that really matters to them until they lose it or it’s too late.

So, to help you avoid that mistake, here are a few things to not waste your life chasing...

 

MONEY

Don’t get me wrong, money is nice.  Money can give you a certain lifestyle that’s enjoyable.

But, when you make money your sole motivation, you stop experiencing the pure joys in life - time with friends and family, the opportunity to chase your curiosity, doing the things that truly light up your soul.  

That’s not to say what truly lights up your soul might also pay you handsomely.  If it does, that’s awesome, but if that’s the case ask yourself what the true motivator is - the money or the work that you’re doing that lights up your soul.  If it’s the money, you’re chasing the wrong thing.

 

ANYTHING TO FILL THE ‘HOLE’ INSIDE

None of us are perfect, and we all have areas of our life that need a little work.  

To better ourselves, heal past wounds, and continue to grow we have to do the work ourselves, on the inside.  No other person or material thing can heal what’s temporarily broken inside.  

For so many people, they are on a lifetime quest to fill the emptiness they feel inside.  

Yes, it’s tough to hold up the mirror and do the work necessary to make those shifts, but that’s the process.  

If you don’t want to deal with what you're feeling and figure out what's truly missing,  you'll waste your life looking for a quick fix.  You will end up chase something that is unattainable for the rest of your life.  

 

ANYTHING UNFULFILLING

If you are wasting your time chasing anything that does not fulfill you on some level, you are wasting your time and energy.  

For example, you are wasting your energy if you are spinning your wheels to get a job promotion for a job or company that doesn’t light you up.  Do yourself a favor and get clear on your values and core needs, so you don’t inadvertently chase the wrong things.

Once you know what fills you up and gives you purpose, you won't waste time on anything that fails to give you that result.

 

WHAT TO CHASE IN LIFE

So, now that you’re clear on what not to chase, let’s take a closer look at what you should chase...

 

YOUR PURPOSE

Your purpose is why are you here.  It’s your driving motivation for living each day to the fullest.  

It's what lights up your soul and makes you feel worthy and meaningful.  Do whatever you can to figure this out and then go live it every single day.

For some of you, you may know what that purpose is, but you’re too afraid to live it.  If that’s you, ask yourself what you’ll regret more...trying it and perhaps failing, or never giving it a try and always wondering ‘what if’?

For a lot of people, their purpose is unrelated to their job.  

You don’t have to get paid to live your purpose.  It’s perfectly acceptable to have a job to pay the bills that doesn’t light you up, as long as you have it outside of your job.

 

YOUR CURIOSITY

If you’ve read Big Magic or heard Elizabeth Gilbert speak, you’ve probably heard her advice to chase your curiosity.

I love this, and it’s one of my life mantras.  

Your curiosity is a natural guide for your growth.  

When you are curious about something, and you follow it, you will learn something new and experience something different.  Following what makes you curious has nothing to do with what others think about you or status symbols, but everything to do with tapping into your inner world and finding new ways to fulfill your sense of adventure.  

Be open to the things you wonder about and go learn more!  You never know where it might lead you.

 

REAL LOVE

Everyone wants love.  This isn’t exactly groundbreaking.  

Unfortunately for a lot of people, they want this so badly, they’re willing to settle for a love that is less than what they deserve and desire.  

People are so afraid of being alone they’ll take the first thing that comes along even though it doesn’t really give them the connection and love they desire.  

By staying in that situation, they’re preventing themselves from finding what they truly want and fulfilling their own fear of never having real love.  

Everyone deserves the true, deep, selfless love that comes with connecting with the right person.  You have to love yourself enough to be okay being single while you hold out for that type of love.  

Don’t settle for lukewarm love...hold out for the red hot, passionate love that you crave.
 

FINAL THOUGHTS

Life is short and typically viewed in hindsight.  How different would your life be if you could actively make choices now that will limit the regrets you have later in life?

Learning what fulfills you and getting clear on your values will allow you to stop wasting time chasing the wrong things in life.

It’s only when you start chasing the right things that magic happens.

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