Purpose, Passion, and Callings: Finding Yours and Changing Your Life

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Do you ever wonder why you’re here?  Or, how you’re supposed to make a difference in this world?  

You know you’re meant to be doing something worthy, something that contributes to society, something that allows you to go to sleep every night feeling good.  

Feeling meaningful.

Feeling fulfilled.

Ever felt like that?

If you have, trust me...you are not alone.

Everyone wants to feel good about what they do with their lives and how they’re spending their days.

I think this is something that is very hard to figure out when you’re young and picking college majors and careers.  How can you possibly know what are your gifts and how to use them to maximize yourself, or to benefit the world around you?

Some folks are lucky enough to figure this out when they’re young, and they chase that calling for the rest of their lives.  But, for most folks, it takes living each day, choosing wrong paths, and screwing up to figure out what you're supposed to be doing with your life.


For most of us, it takes living each day, choosing wrong paths, and screwing up to figure out what we're supposed to be doing with our lives.

This need to find the path that allows you to feel fulfilled, to lead a life that is personally rewarding and, to answer a call in our society is a basic human need.  Everyone wants to know they matter and that they contribute in some way to the world around them. You want to know being here means something.

This need leads you on the quest to find, define, and live out your purpose.

This is a topic that is near and dear to my heart.  It’s a journey I’ve been on for a few years. I know the general theme of my purpose - to enlighten and inspire women to find their calling, define their adventures, and awaken to the life they’re meant to be living - but I’m still working on the specific details of how to make this my living (not that we have to get paid to bring our purpose to life, but it doesn’t hurt!).

I'm in my early 40s (and I love it!).  I don’t feel I’m too old to reinvent my life, in fact, the idea energizes me!  But, I'd be lying if I said I'm not a little terrified at what it might mean for the life I've grown so used to living, but, I’m game to figuring it out and making it happen.

Since this is on my mind a lot and falls into my passion for inspiring others, I want to set aside the next several posts to talk about purpose, passion, and callings - what this all means, why it’s important, why you start craving more of it as you get older, and how to figure it all out.


 

WHY YOU CRAVE DISCOVERING YOUR PURPOSE

When you are approaching, or in the weeds of midlife*, you start to question why you’re here, what you’re doing with your time, and what you’ll leave behind.  You’ve realized how quickly time is flying by and you are starting to lose sleep over these deep questions.

 
*”Midlife”:  Some people like to think ‘midlife’ starts when they hit 50.  If you think you’ll live until your 100+, then you’re right, but with life expectancy hovering around the early 80s, I hate to break it to you buttercup, by ‘midlife’ is your 40s.
 

You’ve reached a point where you’re bored, you feel stuck in the life you’ve worked so hard to create for yourself, and you’re craving something, anything, that will allow you to feel fulfilled.


You’ve reached a point where you’re bored, you feel stuck in the life you’ve worked so hard to create for yourself, and you’re craving something, anything, that will allow you to feel fulfilled.

The solution to answering these questions, getting off the hamster wheel of life, and inviting in activities that give you that sense of fulfillment and meaning, is to start the quest to find your purpose.

Our purpose is an essential ingredient for making the right choices for our life and livelihood.  

When you don’t know your purpose or calling, you float from one unfulfilling job to another and fill our schedules with busyness, so you delude ourselves into feeling you’re living an important life.  But all the while, you’re still feeling an emptiness inside and a craving for something more.

When you know your purpose, you choose how you spend your time more wisely.

As much as I’d love to be able to tell you your purpose, I can’t.  No one can! Only you can identify why you’re here and what you will leave behind.  It’s an inside job, and it starts with you to create the environment to find what that purpose is.

But, make no mistake!  Finding your purpose is a journey you must take to maximize your time on this Earth.

Your purpose is the beam of light that illuminates your path.  It guides you through life. How you live, the choices you make, the boundaries you establish, every yes, every no.


 

HEARING THE CALL TO FIND YOUR PURPOSE

Here’s the thing, for the first half of your life, you’re in building mode.  You’re building your life - from babies, to children, to teenagers, to adults.  A good portion of that time is simply learning how to live and function in the world.  

Once you reach adulthood and launch into your life after college, you’re following a path that may or may not align with who you are at our core.  At this point, most people haven’t had a chance to see the essence of their core, so the path they’re carving for themselves, most likely, isn’t going to bring long-term fulfillment.  

But, during this phase of life, the idea of finding your purpose isn’t high on the radar because it’s not something you’ve ever needed to consider.

But, as you transition into your late 30s and 40s, most people become painfully aware of how fast time passes, and they start to question how they’re spending their time and what it all means.  

You don’t want to waste your life and end it filled with regrets.

It’s not that you don’t want to work, it’s that you want to feel like the effort, energy, and hours you’re dedicating to your job means something to you.


It’s not that you don’t want to work, it’s that you want to feel like the effort, energy, and hours you’re dedicating to your job means something to you.

In my opinion, and after lots of research, this is when the idea of the “Midlife Crisis” starts to take root (and yes...women go through this phase of life, too!).


 

CRISIS IS THE MIRROR OF PURPOSE

In the book The Power of Purpose by Richard Leider, he says “Crisis is the Mirror of Purpose.”

Most people don’t wake up and realize they've settled in life and they're merely existing (instead of fully living), until a crisis happens.

The crisis serves as a mirror to see how unfulfilling life has become and spurs needed changes.  A crisis can take the form of something that happens externally and out of our control that shakes our foundation.  A few examples include:

  • Death of a loved one

  • Major illness

  • Job loss

  • Divorce

  • Business failure

 

But, it doesn’t always take a significant external crisis to wake us up.  Approaching major life milestones can have the same eye-opening effect. For example,

  • A significant birthday (i.e., 40, 50, etc.)

  • A child leaving for college (i.e., empty nester)

  • Retirement

  • Menopause

 

These triggers knock you off your feet and cause to you ask big life questions:

  • Who am I?

  • Why am I here?

  • What am I doing with myself/my life?

  • What do I want to leave behind?

 

When these questions start to surface, you can’t ignore them, and they must be answered.  Finding your purpose allows you to finally live your life according to your internal desires and expectations instead of external hopes and expectations.


Finding your purpose allows you to finally live your life according to your internal desires and expectations instead of external hopes and expectations.

You get to figure out who you are at your core so you can express that purpose and invite fulfillment and meaning into your lives.  You get to start creating your legacy.

 

WHAT DOES ALL OF THIS MEAN?

When you start hearing those deep life questions, you can’t - and shouldn’t - ignore them.  They serve as your wake-up call to figure out the answers and adjust your lives accordingly.

I’ll be honest; it’s not easy!  I’ve been through this myself, and I’m still working out the details, but I know to ignore it would mean living a half-life.  I’d rather shake things up now and be a little uncomfortable in the process, then wake up on my 75th birthday and regret the last 30+ years of my life for staying stuck on a hamster wheel that isn’t working.

 

**BONUS:  FOR MY EMAIL COMMUNITY!**

So, if you’re pondering those life questions, I want you to start exploring them instead of just spinning your wheels thinking about them.  To that end, I’ve put together a mini-workbook that asks a few questions to get you thinking (and writing!) as a bonus for my email community!

My email community enjoys weekly emails on topics that explore finding their purpose and creating the life they crave.  I also provide them with workbooks, journal prompts, audios, and other goodies to explore what they’re craving, what’s getting in their way, and how to make the life they desire happen.  

 
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In this workbook, I’ve provided questions along with space to write out your answers and brainstorm.  Putting pen to paper has a powerful impact on your intuition and allows you dig through the inner critic voices and get to your truth.   

If you’d like to get in on the fun, join my email community by clicking the button below and as a bonus and big thank you, I’ll send you this workbook so you too can dig in and start finding your purpose!

 

Carve out some time for yourself to think these through and start to get unstuck, uncover your purpose, and live the life you’re craving.