Posts tagged Internal Threads
How to Change your Comparison Strategy to Feel Better About Yourself (and grow!)

Guess what?  It’s human nature to compare yourself to others.

Yep...I said it:  It’s normal to look to other people as a means to evaluate yourself.

I’m not going to tell you to stop doing this, either, because you can’t.  And you shouldn’t.

Looking at others and comparing yourself to them is a necessary component of self-awareness.  Self-awareness plays a significant role in emotional intelligence.

In other words, you have to be aware of others in order to be mindful of yourself.

But, there are two sides to comparison - a shadow side and a light side.

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5 Tips to Escape the Comparison Trap

There was a time I didn’t like all that much about myself.  I hate to admit that, because it feels so ‘icky,’ but it’s the truth!

Everyone else was prettier, smarter, funnier, more talented, thinner, more successful...well, you get my point.

No matter where I looked, I always felt behind, less accomplished, or simply not enough.

As a result, it felt like everything I wanted was out of reach because I didn’t have what it took, or everyone else was better suited.

Let me tell life in that trap became exhausting!  

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How to Stop Feeling Guilty All The Time

Guilt...that oh-so-common emotion that is a daily burden for the majority of women.

Does any of this sound familiar?

“I hate that I have to finish up this project for work on the weekend!  I’m not spending enough time with my family!”

“I shouldn’t have spent that much money on myself.”

“I feel bad that I slept in this morning instead of getting up and cleaning the house.”

“I should’ve checked in again on Aunt Martha (even though I’ve already called her three times already!).”

“I shouldn’t have had dessert last night.  Now I’ll have to skip lunch today, or work out longer at the gym if I can actually make it to the gym tonight!”

“I never do enough for my family.”

Feeling guilty is at an all-time high for midlife women (women over 40).  Unfortunately, all this guilt is preventing us from taking much-needed time for ourselves to recharge, address our needs, explore our curiosities, and alter our course as we see fit.

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How to Choose the Positive Mindset Over the Negative

Did you know it’s human nature to focus more on the negative than the positive aspects of life?  

In other words, instead of challenging the highlight reel of our lives that play in our minds, we simply accept the falls, setbacks, challenges, and disappointments as the reality of our lives.

Looking back, we completely ignore the wins, hell-yeahs, and situations where we blew our expectations out of the water.

Looking ahead, instead of questioning the story we tell ourselves of what will likely happen if we walk out on that limb, we simply believe it’ll crack under our weight, and we’ll tumble to the ground in a heap of regret and humiliation.

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Avoid the Shiny Objects! Why Internal Motivators are better measures of Success

We live in an Instagram inspired world where on a daily basis we lay witness to all the pretty things everyone else around us owns.

We also see the trips others jet off to on a regular frequency, and the new cars they acquire.

We see these folks as “having it all” and wonder why we can’t seem to achieve what they’ve accomplished.

What we don’t see is the staggering amount of debt they try to avoid each month or the tears they shed as they try to fall asleep after yet another gut-wrenching fight with their spouse.

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Doing it Scared: The Secret to a Fulfilling Life

Guess what?  Everyone is afraid of something!

Even the most confident of folks out there battle their internal fears.  Most people, give into those fears and let them decide their actions for them.  But, for those that appear to be fearless, they aren’t:  they just feel the fear and do it scared.

Fear can come from many sources, but when it comes to going for what you want in life, the most common cause of fear is the unknown.  If you don’t know what’s going to happen or you’re entering into unchartered territories, it’s going to feel scary.

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Life After Divorce: How to Trust Again

Divorce sucks.

No matter which side of the table you’re sitting on, getting over a divorce is not exactly a day at the beach.  But, with time, the crappy stuff starts to subside and the gold nuggets begin to emerge.

Navigating divorce is very much like peeling an onion: there are a lot of layers that have to come off to get to the good stuff (ok, so the center of an onion isn't any different than the exterior layers, but just go with here, okay?).  As the outer layers slough off, the inevitable tears make it harder to see what's happening.  But, you eventually get there, the tears subside, and things start to look (and smell!) a lot better.

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Benefits of Unconditionally Accepting Yourself

Close your eyes and think about yourself for just a moment…head to toe, inside and out.

Do you accept yourself 100% as you are right now?

Or, do you feel you’d accept and love yourself more if you could justttt….lose those last 5 pounds, say ‘no’ more often, be a better wife/mom/daughter/friend/boss/employee/etc.?

It's typical for women to be hard on themselves and be their own worst critic.  But, the result of that overly harsh inner monologue is that those thoughts impact your sense of self-worth.

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Facing Fears and Kicking Booty

If you were guaranteed success, what dream would you chase?

Would it be to…

  • Quit your soul-sucking job and change directions to a new career that would finally light you up?

  • Write the book that’s been writing itself in your mind for what feels like forever?

  • Put yourself back out there and finally search for the love you crave?

  • Go on that trip you’ve been Pinning for years and enjoy a much-deserved break?

Everyone has dreams.  

Some dreams are big, some are small, and others are somewhere in the middle.  Some dreams feel achievable and others feel so far out of reach, they might as well be stars in the night-sky.

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Your Permission Slip: Make Yourself a Priority

I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that you’re exhausted, stressed out, and feeling pulled from all angles.

Maybe it’s your partner, kids, dog, and a crazy schedule that have you running around in circles.  Or, perhaps it’s a demanding boss and high-stress job that needs your constant attention.

Whatever it is, you’re stretched thin, and you’re ready to snap.  

Sound familiar?

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