Posts tagged October 2018
How to Stop Feeling Guilty All The Time

Guilt...that oh-so-common emotion that is a daily burden for the majority of women.

Does any of this sound familiar?

“I hate that I have to finish up this project for work on the weekend!  I’m not spending enough time with my family!”

“I shouldn’t have spent that much money on myself.”

“I feel bad that I slept in this morning instead of getting up and cleaning the house.”

“I should’ve checked in again on Aunt Martha (even though I’ve already called her three times already!).”

“I shouldn’t have had dessert last night.  Now I’ll have to skip lunch today, or work out longer at the gym if I can actually make it to the gym tonight!”

“I never do enough for my family.”

Feeling guilty is at an all-time high for midlife women (women over 40).  Unfortunately, all this guilt is preventing us from taking much-needed time for ourselves to recharge, address our needs, explore our curiosities, and alter our course as we see fit.

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Don't get stuck in the Midlife Muck

As we approach our 40s, we enter into, what I call, a midlife transition.

Waking up and realizing that we’re not old, but we’re no longer young is what kicks off the first phase:  the Midlife Crisis (yes, women have those too!).

Eventually, we make it to the Midlife Awakening where we begin living a life of intention, purpose, and fulfillment.

But, to get from the Midlife Crisis to the Midlife Awakening, we have to navigate a middle stage:  the Midlife Muck.

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The Masks we Wear in Our Midlife Muck

As you move through your day, do you ever experience situations where you feel you have to pretend to be someone you’re not?

Maybe it’s with a neighbor, and you’re trying to appear pulled together, and on top of things despite the fact your coat is covering a fresh (and damp!) coffee stain on your shirt, your sock has a hole in it, and you’ve just discovered you forgot to pay the electric bill last month.

Or, maybe it’s with your mother-in-law as you pretend everything is hunky-dory with your marriage and her son wasn’t a total jerk to you and the kids over the weekend.

Or, maybe it’s who you have to become when you go to work every single day.  

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How to Choose the Positive Mindset Over the Negative

Did you know it’s human nature to focus more on the negative than the positive aspects of life?  

In other words, instead of challenging the highlight reel of our lives that play in our minds, we simply accept the falls, setbacks, challenges, and disappointments as the reality of our lives.

Looking back, we completely ignore the wins, hell-yeahs, and situations where we blew our expectations out of the water.

Looking ahead, instead of questioning the story we tell ourselves of what will likely happen if we walk out on that limb, we simply believe it’ll crack under our weight, and we’ll tumble to the ground in a heap of regret and humiliation.

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